Pope Francis Announces He Will Canonize the Living

Vatican, 4/1/2016---In a move to streamline the Church's procedures for making new saints, Pope Francis will begin canonizing living persons. Although a departure from the customary process, which required proven miracles and a gradual elevation to the honors of the altar, the Holy Father expects his new program to be met with universal approbation. "The new canonizations will incur far less bureaucracy and the expense of prosecuting the cause of a saint," said Father Federico Lombardi, Vatican communications director. "And dropping the requirement that the proposed saint actually be dead will render the process fairer, because it will exclude no one." Instead of a lengthy process carried on my religious communities, bishops, or other elites, the new criteria will speed up the progress by incorporating the latest technology, Lombardi said. "For the first time, the Catholic faithful will have a direct say in who becomes a saint. They will be able to vote in an online poll for their favorite candidate, living or dead," he added. As an expression of ecumenical spirit, non-Catholics will also be allowed to vote. "We are an inclusive Church," Lombardi said, "and we want our feast days to reflect that."